Good Friday

Today I have a heavy heart. It is Good Friday. Or, as I discovered, some people around the world call it Big Friday. Today is the say when Jesus was nailed to the cross. I can not help the tears running down my face. A sinless, perfect, spotless lamb went to slaughter. For me. For you. Nails through his hands and feet. A thorn of crowns pressed into his brow. Jeer at and mocked. And he willingly did this so that I could stand before God, blameless one day.

Esther sees me weeping and reminds me how we should not be sad today - as in 3 days Jesus will have risen, conquering the grave. She is such a sweet child. Hates to see me sad. My pain is her pain. I explain there is much joy in Christ's resurrection. However, today - I am deeply sorrowful. That MY sins...not always obeying God, or treating my husband with respect, lies I have told...are what nailed Jesus to the cross.

May I never forget. Lord, help me to keep this repentant heart always - feeling always the complete gratitude for Christ's sufferings for me. In Jesus' precious name...Amen.

It's a bird! It's a plane! It's a...a...plane.

Hello out there! Today we booked the flights for me to take our sweet blessings on a trip to Southern California to visit my parents, and my father-in-law. For those of you don't know, both Hubby and I were born and raised in Southern California. I, in Fountain Valley (next door to Huntington Beach - not in "The Valley"). And Hubby, in Anaheim. Since we are now stationed on the west coast - it is much more feasible for me to take the kids down for an extended visit to see the grandparents.

So, from July 7th to the 27th we will be in Southern California. Of course we are going to be doing the touristy things. I am taking the kids to Disneyland, Legoland, and the San Diego Zoo. My greatest hope is to be able to spend a Sunday worshiping at our old church, Calvary Chapel San Diego. Oh how I miss it! Pastor Bryan Newberry is so anointed by the Lord. The Lord just speaks right through Bryan. I could sit and listen to him for days. In fact, I do. On the church's website, they have all of Bryan's sermons through every book of the Bible. Often , as I cook or am cleaning up I will put on one of his sermons. In the last month, I have listened to him preach through Malachi, Micah, and am nearly through his preaching of Ezra. His sermons are nearly 90 minutes. Line by line through the Word. It is fascinating how he can extrapolate on the meanings of the words in Hebrew, Greek, and Aramaic...what things meant to people in the time when the Bible was penned, and Biblical history - how the prophets, and governments ran together and such. If you care to listen - go here...

http://www.calvarysandiego.com/CCSD/pages/BibleStudyTools/Sermons/PastorBryan/ThroughTheBible.htm

Moving away from our home church in 2007 was so difficult. We have yet to find another church quite like it. We grew so much as a family in the Lord. So much meat. I really like our church here, Sequim Bible Church - but what I don't like is the 4o minute sermons. Just when the pastor here at SBC is getting into the meaty stuff it is over.

Oh dear - I didn't mean to go off on a tangent. And I certainly do not want to come across as being a worshiper of man. However, those of you who have had the experience of learning from someone who the Lord just flows through - knows just what I mean.

There you have it. As a quick re-cap, we are going to California this summer for a time of visiting family, and also fun. Hubby won't be coming, as he can not get the time off. I'll miss him. But, I am sure the time will fly. It is only for 3 weeks.

Decision has been made.

Today hubby and I read this...it is from this blog.

A 2nd Generation of Homeschooling: Is it sinful to try to conceive more children?

A 2nd Generation of Homeschooling: Is it sinful to try to conceive more children?

Is it sinful to try to conceive more children?

Reposted from June 9, 2008

The Box

Since sometimes we struggle grasping the idea of children being gifts from God, here's another way to look at it. Assume you have a special hiding place where your husband habitually leaves sweet presents for you. Say, a little box on a shelf in your closet.

One day, he finds that you screwed the box closed and then wrapped duct tape securely around it in your best efforts to keep him from putting any other gifts in there. He still COULD [put the gifts in the box], but he definitely got the message. He would get the impression that you obviously didn't like his previous gifts (if he had already given you any). So much so that you didn't want another one.

If you had just gotten married and you both knew that he was PLANNING to put gifts in this little box and he found it in the above described way, he would probably be hurt that you didn't even want the first gift from him. "She doesn't think I can give her good gifts!" he would think to himself.

However, how would he feel if you put that box right where he could see it, perhaps even leaving it open, eagerly waiting for his gift! YOU cannot put the gift there, but you can certainly do your best to remind him that you LOVE his gifts and are EAGERLY awaiting another one!

Now, think of the husband as God and the special box as your womb. Keep in mind that God is God and not a man who doesn't always get us. He knows what is best for us, He knows what we need, He is our provider, our protector, He gives us all that we need and never gives us something that would destroy us but gives us "every good gift. ~ Kelly Leinbach

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After reading it, hubby looks at me and says, "that was rather profound". I said that I agreed. We then, together came to to realization that we need to give my womb to the Lord. That sounds so silly. It conjures up a very odd mental picture. However, we are. From here on in - trusting the Lord 100% with our family planning. I was ready, hubby was a bit fearful. But onward Christian soldiers! Before reading the above blog post - we had never thought of my womb in that fashion. As a place where God places special gifts to us. And how by trying to control it we were tell God that we don't want any more gifts. We may never be gifted with any more "blessings" - or we may have many more. One thing is for sure. We are content to let the Lord guide us down the road of life with as many blessings as he wishes to send.

A Quick Recap for the Week...

Today is Sunday. The Lord's day. Hubby had duty last night - so I am awaiting his return in the next half hour or so. A little recap from this past week: The government seems to have avoided a shutdown - for now. Of course, there is already bigger things looming ahead. That is ok, bring it on. Nothing will ever compare, or be bigger than my God. So go ahead. Let's roll on the 2012 budget, and the debt ceiling. We finished week 2 of Brain Integration Therapy. Schooling is rolling along at a nice pace. Esther has just about finished the language arts part of her curriculum. I have switched their math from Saxon to Abeka. I think Esther had been falling behind a bit with Saxon. I will be continuing with math over the summer with her to get her caught up. 2 weeks until Easter. I am going to be teaching the Sunday school class about Moses and the Passover this week. I was going to do Passover next week - when Passover starts, but next weekend is Palm Sunday - and we will be focusing on that, then Easter. I hope hubby gets home in time to stop off at the store so I can get some Matza for the kids to try. I am still debating heading down to California for my dad's wedding. Fred is more than willing to take a week off so I can go - but I just don't like the idea of leaving jack amidst the new schooling routine, and having Fred burn a week of leave. He only has 28 days on the books. That would take him down to 20 (he is taking 8 days - so we can have a day together when I return). Personally, I don't like him being down to less than 3 weeks of leave on the books. He will be taking another 3 days in mid-August when we go camping. And I was hoping he could take 5 days or so when the kids and I travel down to Cali for a month. Hmmm. All of that would take him down to less than 2 weeks on the books. I guess more prayer is in order. Well, I must go if I wish to get everyone ready in time to be on time. Until next time friends...

Thursday, and frustrations over our tyrannical government.

Happy Thursday to you! Wow Thursday. Today is the last day of our learning week. Tomorrow is Brain Integration Therapy day. So no other big schooling. We will do read alouds - but no formal schooling.

Tomorrow is the big day - the government is supposed to shut down. I hope the Repubs stand their ground and let it shut down. I know, I know. We are military and won't get payed. But. BUT...the dems. refused to pass a budget last year - and now we are in a horrible mess. We can not keep spending at the rate Obama and the liberal/commies want to. For some reason they seem to think that you can spend yourself out of a deficit. Hubby has been put on alert. They had a big meeting yesterday that said, "Even if the gov't shuts down - as expected, you still MUST come to work". No biggie. What gets me is that the house has sent 2 bills to the senate allowing for continued funding for the military through the rest of the fiscal year - but the evil Harry Reid won't let it be voted upon. Ugh. Nothing like arm twisting - eh? Nothing like telling the very men and women putting their lives on the line to work for free. I stand firm that this shut down needs to take place. If the rebpubs don't get their rears in gear and stand firm - then the dems are going to bully them forever, and there will never be any clout when the repubs put their foot down.

Ugh. This all just gives me such a headache. Come Lord Jesus Come! My heart aches at our government. Well, I can hardly say "our" government. They are not looking out for us. They want to crash our nation and turn us into some - oh I don't know. Some Nazi - communist state. Deciding who gets the opportunity to live or die. Who gets needed medical treatment. Oh and lets not forget - who has the right to worship openly. Lord help me, because I am having some not very Christian thoughts this morning.

A Not so Manic Monday.

Good Monday morning sheeple! What a great weekend! I love weekends like this. Olivia went across the sound with her youth group (First Baptist Port Angeles) to a Christian concert and youth rally called "Acquire the Fire". She didn't get home until after midnight and had a blast. The other children were rather sullen as we spent the day giving the house a good spring clean - and they saw her absence as "lucky" for her. Sunday I was up before the sun baking a cheesecake and key lime pie for dessert because our fabulous neighbors were to be over for dinner. Church was FANTASTIC! There were 11 kids in my class. I love having a class with multiaged class. Everyone got along well and were so well behaved. Pastor Dave gave a great sermon. Well, he always does. My only complaint is that I wish he would teach longer. So here we are - and a great blessing just walked through the door! Hubby!!!! He had to go into work for a bit on Saturday and he went to work to find that all those that had to come in had been given the day off. Yippee! This may just call for a field trip day at home school. Hiking up at Hurricane Ridge sounds nice.

Ok. I admit. I have the fever.

Baby fever that is. Oh gosh. Did I just admit that? I have been trying to lie to myself that I didn't want another child. I have been dropping hints at hubby. He hasn't really commented one way or another. Yesterday I told him I had some news for him. I forget now, what the actual news was. He said to me, "You're pregnant?". I said, "yes I am". Of course I was joking. But part of me wanted to see his reaction. I asked him what his reaction would have been if I really was expecting another baby. His answer, "It would be weird". I told him unashamedly, "you know - I would not be sad at all". That is kind of where the topic ended. How did this happen? I was so sure we were done - and I didn't want anymore. Here we are 3+ years out from our last baby's birth. I thought for sure I had made it. I was looking forward to the prospect of being completely done with diapers soon. Being able to get away on date nights. Yet all of a sudden I am plagued by this overwhelming desire to have more another baby. So I am accepting baby dust I guess? Well, that and prayers that hubby gets the fever too.